The freedom from social patterns of taking turns talking and listening affords you the opportunity to think past socially conventional speech into concepts and ideas that need ventilation. What I do when you are speaking is to follow you closely, gathering my own thoughts while listening and then trying my best to offer insights. I listen for the feelings just below the surface, for conflict, for unconscious communication, and for what kinds of defenses are stabilizing or smothering.
My goal is to offer supportive attention as you uncensor yourself and express your range of emotions. Deconstructing “problem saturated” stories to build new narratives can create a break-through experience of new possibilities based on freeing yourself and your thoughts. I believe that your views are respected and a valid way of construing the world. It could be that the things you might do to survive difficult circumstances, maintain connections, and prevent losses can reveal gaps in your relational learning, problem, and conflicts that can be the focus of our attention.
As you look at my photo, sense if you have a feeling of a recognition of yourself? Does the picture of my face align with you and convey empathy and interest? A useful way to explore if you can feel a safe and comfortable speaking with me about anything is to feel if you have a beginning sense of some recognition of yourself with my picture.
Multiple self states that hold different positions, ranges of feelings and emotions are another method for survival in a diverse world of things and relationships. We make room for all the parts of you viewing the world and relationships from different values and beliefs, with equanimity towards all your parts. Parts work is a therapeutic idea from the Internal Family Systems therapy model, which normalizes the different parts of each of us that hold different points of view, body-centering sensations and boundaries, and the feeling of ones self in space.
The stages of change that resonate with me come from The Transtheoretical Model of Behavior Change by James O. Prochaska and Carlo De Clemente. This model was developed after looking at many different theories of psychotherapy. It is good to know where you are in the change process with each of your concerns, so we can focus on exactly where you are in making decisions and contemplating futures for yourself.
The stages of change are precontemplation, contemplation, preparation, action, and maintenance.